Emotional over boarding

Do you recall what i said about

being in a a hype of emotions

when you face that extreme sense of feeling

and emotions

when you can actually go to be extremely positive

or extremely negative 

it all comes down to that saying

"never do anything when you are mad

never do any promises when you are happy"

and they were true 

the human emotion sometimes can be so powerfully uncontrollable

and it can has its proven toll on the human body 

let me share a couple of examples of how one goes through an

emotional down turn and how they react

Situation 1

a person i know who is so goal oriented and determined 

to lose weight and gain a healthy fit body

he has weighed himself and discovered

that he was a bit behind of his overall goal 

and saw it as a setback thus making him feel sad

and as a result he decided to go take it all out 

on training himself and doing harsh exerciser 

Situation 2 

a friend of mine has gotten into a disagreement 

with his significant other, and somehow gotten into a fight with them

and as a result he felt agitated and took it all out on the things around him

he started slamming on doors as a way to vent out his anger

it was so intense that he even his nose bled as a result

so you can see by now sometimes 

one can go on an emotional overboard when they feel down

or even when they feel happy 

they can go extremely apparent in showing their happiness 

and as we also saw from those situations 

one can clearly show it as a side effect on their bodies

bottom line

once you know you can go on an emotional overboard

you can actually avoid it

and avoid the long term health implications that follow with that 

stay safe and stay healthy and stay positive too =)  

Discouragements and Discourages

Ever wondered how come it always happens this way?

ever wondered how it came to happen that there are certain people 

who would just like to "rain on your parade" ?

truth of the matter is that there are always people who are of that sort

people who are always out there to just discourage you 

meaning people who will always have a way to just say 

that what ever you will be doing it will never be good enough 

let me show you a couple of examples 

(personal example which by the way all happened to me) 

these examples are reflected on the fact that i joined a new company

and accepted a new work challenge, in turn these example are peoples reflections towards 

me working in this new company 

Example No.1

a social gathering takes place and a "very close relative" explains

to a guest where i am working at 

(Oh Hassan is working now at this "SMALL UNKNOWN" company)

Example No.2

another social gathering takes place at a cafe, old friends from university sit together

and we exchange conversations on where we are at life

then came the question where we are working at the moment

of course i reply back i started working in a company and started in this new field

as soon as i finished my sentence, a get a complete negative feedback of how

my field is completely "YUCKY" field and that it is completely useless so to speak  

nonetheless he kept on going with completely negative comments

not even a simple good luck that would have sufficed and made the conversation better

Of course after reflecting more into these situations

i thought more about this situation and about this matter 

of course one conclusion on this matter is that 

there will always be discouragements in life

and people who have it a habit in them to discourage others

another thing i have concluded from the matter is that

there are people who never achieved in their lives 

something substantial to be worth mentioning 

once others have reach a place

they discourage them 

BECAUSE

they never saw it in them to achieve

and be successful as you may be

of course other attributing factors to the previous point

is having envious jealousy as a byproduct of not being successful 

and not scoring an achievement

more accurately a "sore looser"

"a  sour grape" and the list goes on

but lets not shed the light on them negatively 

it is hard work and motivation that drives a person to be successful 

so for all those "people who discourage" i would like to just say

have you tried what you are discouraging of?

if not how are you basing your judgement?

moreover i would like to say maybe you are not trying hard enough ;) 

CONCLUSION

lets put it in simpler terms

Haters are always going to hate 

they will discourage you

put you down and tell you 

that what ever you are doing is not good

and that they are the best at what they do

its only there way in saying i am not good enough

and i decided to take it out on you !

Own up to the responsibility

Hello everyone

July came in, the summer got more intense 

and many more opportunities are coming in 

a story i would love to share with you dear readers, its an interesting way 

how the events fell into place

it started a couple of weeks ago, as a friend of mine was calling out

as he wanted me to help him with something 

it was a serious matter 

it was a mistake and as a result help was needed

after sorting things out and after things were sorted out

my friend seemed as if it did not bother him 

next thing was that he done some other mistake 

but it wasn't as serious as the first one

and after the second incident 

there had to be some sort of intervention 

or some way to tell this person (my friend) was that he is going on a roll down 

so recently there was a conversation going on between me and him

Yes i admit it was harsh (because it came out as judgment) 

SIDE LESSON : try to always convey the message more openly as people

may misinterpret it as in my case 

the person thought it was a harsh judgment passed on him 

but if it was not judgment passed by a friend it could be more worse

it would have been a judgment passed by people

and that sort of judgment could have been worse !

to continue along with the story, the main moral of it

was that the owner of the problems

did not seem to have grasped to concept of owning up the problems that he caused

as an attempt from him to try and explain how it is on his side

he tried to do an emotional blackmail 

and tried to play the guilt card 

saying that he already feels guilty enough deep inside him

IMPORTANT NOTE

of course you will feel guilty, because that is your conscious speaking 

it is the moving motive in what will make you grasp the fact

that you made a mistake 

and it will only go once you start making things right 

so that blame feeling is nothing but a way your mind

and heart speaking to you to make the right thing !

The lessons from our story

 (for those who would like to just skip to this part)

you make a mistake 

you feel the blame 

you own up to your mistake and take responsibility to it

yes your friend will judge you 

but would you rather listen to your friends judge you

or listen to a complete stranger slandering you?

When do you move on?

a question i contemplated many times today

as i was going through a phase at my life

i just got detached from something i thought would bring

probable joy to my life (or so i thought) 

we get to that ugly stage of (being wound up in mixed emotions)

you then figure things out

you re-evaluate yourself and recalculate what was it that you have been doing wrong

and then you decide to move on 

that was the thing that i went through 

i made my mistakes and i have re-calculated what i should be doing again in my life 

and then i decided that its time for me to move on !

Pretty natural isn't it?

how this cycle of progression is in life

Mistake - Realization - Correcting - Moving on

it's the last bit that was a bit confusing to me 

its somewhere along that process where you give yourself time

to heal and reflect and progress from the whole matter that you encountered

but sometimes you ask yourself 

When should i move on?

fact of the matter is

and as much as it sounds (obviously dumb)

There is no perfect time to move on

just like that decision you want to take on for a big project

like for example you tell yourself (I want to start a healthy lifestyle)

and then you think mostly about (when) you want to do that

and end up not doing it !

well here is what you need to know

there is not perfect timing to do things

if you discovered that you failed at when you started 

you discovered that it was a bad timing and you went back to square one

if you hit it off from the start then you know it was right all along !

never tell yourself i will start doing something next week, next month

or in the eve of the new year 

JUST DO IT (and no that is not a reference to Nike ads hehe)

make today the day where you decide to take that initiative 

and do that thing that you have always to (nonchalantly postpone) 

and the goals for this month were ... not achieved !

remember last month

when i decided on doing a (certain set of goals for a certain set of time)

which was conveniently titled 

and the goals for this month are

and in its second installment 

which dictated what are the goals in the second part of the series

part deux 

i am glad to say announce in this third part of this

series of blogs that 

i have not achieved most of what i said ! 

bummer isn't it?

well not quite

as it is normal for a goal which is somewhat vague 

and somewhat plain and not so specific to get lost in time 

where you have to achieve it and how to achieve it 

so sometimes its back to the drawing board

but what if the goal is clear and simple

and you cannot go any clearer than that ?

well then its a thing in the goal its self

that it needs or consumes time 

until it is achieved 

and if you are like me

what made me fall into this whole dilemma 

is the fact that i am recently not having much time 

however all this comes down to one thing

(its better to aim low and achieve than to aim high and not achieve)

and i can safely say that i have at least started with something 

which is started to eat right

all that is need is to follow up on that and all should remain in the right track !

emotional blackmail

we all know the normal blackmailing of a person don't we?

plainly its a situation where you have dirt on someone

and you take advantage of it, in exchange of something from them 

or mainly to comply with what they want 

and is there such a thing as (emotional blackmail)

surprisingly (obviously) Yes there is !

i have read it from a book 

(why men lie and women cry)

a whole chapter about (emotional blackmailing) 

and how sometimes people tend to lean on to it 

as a solution 

some may realize that they are doing it

some may not realize at all !

now as the definition above for black mail states

the same applies for (emotional blackmail)

but has different dimensions

lets take an example 

Joe and Sam are good friends, Joe tends to be the type of person that would 

have wild fun and sometimes just go crazy occasionally, one day as a result of one of his crazy night outs

he had a minor accident with his fathers expensive car, he approaches sam knowing he is his good friend

sam was at tight situation however he approached him and asked for help

at the beginning he resisted 

and said that he could not help out, he can gladly do so but he could not at that time

and then the glorious statement came in from Joe

( i cannot believe what i am hearing, if you were a good friend i would guess that you would have help out) 

that there is emotional blackmail 

know what is going on

* The victim : Sam

*offender : Joe

* cause (or what he wants) : cash to help out in joe's situation 

*weapon of use : feelings and the friendship the two have together

usually it can also go through the threat of not going to give more emotions

or devotion towards the relationship

and i believe some of us if not most of us

have faced such issues

now that you know it

you can actually work to counter it !

and to avoid 

Love yourself 

(since you would know your self and know you are over all a good person and that

what ever it is happening at that time is just something that was beyond your reach)

stay logical

(of course if one and one is two, it will stay that way no one can ever invent an answer

that is beyond understanding or an answer that is unreasonable)

and good luck to you all :) 

confessions of a young adult

lately i have been toying with the idea of this 

confessional about something that has bothered me 

for quite some time 

as i was thinking about it many thinks came into place

and each and every single idea formed the big picture

just like assembling jigsaw puzzles 

as i was roaming aimlessly through the internet

i came across this captioned picture which was from 

the (daily what) website 

it hit me quite direct that it was true

when we go into university 

we suffer supposedly from the whole system 

how we need to meet up with deadlines and finish projects

and presentations and try and finish up assignments

and the worst monster of all that you need to battle

are exams and quizzes

at that point we only realize that as the main problem that we are facing in our life

and that there is only one objective tied within that (problem that we are facing)

in order to get through it we need to work hard

to eventually (Graduate) 

and then after that is over 

we begin a new chapter 

which is (real world) 

and so at that point it also hit me 

that the teachers and the professors and the instructors

who you pass by at university 

don't actually teach you anything about life !

even though at a certain level 

i would like to believe that they did teach something 

related to life which is working under pressure and dealing with deadlines

that could be something related to (the real world)

but the majority of things that we face in life

are somethings that we learn on the spot

when things happen

and University or (higher level education) has nothing to do with it

clearly the way it is seen is just as relating to the picture

(getting through the easiest part of life) 

 my teachers taught me all about (Marketing) which was my major

they taught me about the market and how to understand it 

and how things go around and what you should do and not do

yes again ... 

Higher education teaches you things about the career you want to go into

but not the things that go behind the curtain 

which are the real things that occur in life

like for example me personally

i have went from one work place to another

in order to try and figure things out

never did i know that life actually can go like this captioned picture (meme)

which i also saw on the web 

courtesy of 9gag (LOL)

as a young adult i know for a fact 

that i personally don't know what i will face in my life

and in my future

for no one has the answers to anything in life

no one knows how things will fall into place

as they fall into place through a divine order 

which we can never really figure out !

but i really do wish that if my education 

geared me more towards handling such situations

yet in life 

i know for sure

you won't be geared for any situation 

unless you face that situation that makes you gear up

to avoid it happening any other time again in the future !

such is life ...